Being a mom is hard. There are so many decisions to make every day, and not all of them will be perfect.

Sometimes, they won’t even be good.

But here’s the thing—making a bad choice doesn’t mean you’re a bad mom. It means you’re human.

What Does “Bad Choice” Even Mean?

Let’s start by breaking down the idea of a "bad choice."

A bad choice often depends on who’s looking at it.

Did you let your toddler watch an extra episode of their favorite cartoon so you could breathe for five minutes?

Someone might call that a bad choice.

But for you, it might have been survival.

Parenting isn’t black and white.

What feels wrong to one mom might feel completely right to another. And that’s okay.

Why Moms Feel So Guilty

Mom guilt is real. It’s that nagging voice in your head saying you’re not doing enough or that you’ve somehow failed.

But let’s be real—this guilt often comes from impossible standards.

Social media doesn’t help.

It’s easy to scroll through and see moms posting about homemade meals, spotless houses, and kids who look like they belong in a catalog.

But those are just highlights.

Nobody posts about the meltdowns, the messy kitchens, or the nights they’ve cried in the bathroom.

Guilt also sneaks in when you compare yourself to others.

Maybe your neighbor seems to have it all together, or the mom at school always volunteers for every activity.

But comparing doesn’t help. You’re living your story, not theirs.

Every Mom Makes “Bad” Choices

Every single mom makes choices they’re not proud of.

Maybe you lost your temper. Maybe you forgot to pack lunch.

Maybe you chose work over a school play. These moments don’t define you.

Here’s a secret: those moms you think are perfect?

They make mistakes too. The difference is they’ve learned to give themselves grace.

And you can too.

Learning From Your Choices

Bad choices can actually teach us a lot.

Maybe losing your temper helps you realize you need a better way to manage stress.

Forgetting lunch? It’s a reminder to slow down in the morning rush.

These moments don’t make you a bad mom—they make you a growing mom.

Instead of beating yourself up, ask, “What can I learn from this?”

Growth doesn’t come from perfection. It comes from trial and error.

The Pressure to Be Perfect

So much of the pressure moms feel comes from trying to be perfect.

But perfection is a myth. No one gets it right 100% of the time.

And kids don’t need perfect moms.

They need moms who show up, love them, and try their best.

When you focus on being a “good” mom, you miss out on just being a mom.

You’re allowed to be messy, tired, and real.

That’s what your kids will remember—not the spotless kitchen or the perfect Pinterest project.

Redefining “Good Mom”

Being a good mom doesn’t mean you never mess up.

It means you’re doing the best you can with what you have.

Some days (or weeks), that might mean serving frozen pizza or cereal for dinner.

Other days, it might mean saying no to one more bedtime story because you’re completely drained.

A good mom knows she’s not perfect but keeps showing up anyway.

She’s willing to apologize when she’s wrong. She’s not afraid to ask for help.

She’s real.

Giving Yourself Grace

Grace is a game-changer.

It’s about being kind to yourself, even when you mess up.

Think about how you’d talk to a friend.

Would you tell her she’s a bad mom for making a mistake? Of course not.

You’d remind her of all the things she’s doing right. Now, talk to yourself the same way.

When mom guilt creeps in, counter it with truth.

Yes, you made a mistake, but that mistake doesn’t erase all the good things you do.

Mother seeking support from a friend at a coffee shop

Asking for Support

If you’re struggling, it’s okay to ask for help.

Whether it’s from your partner, a friend, or a therapist, reaching out doesn’t make you weak.

It makes you strong. No one was meant to do this alone.

Support can look like a lot of things.

It might mean swapping babysitting with a friend so you both get a break.

It could be venting to someone who gets it. Joining a mom sobriety group.

Or it might be finding a church group where you feel less alone.

Your Kids Don’t Need Perfect

Your kids won’t remember the times you forgot something or made a bad call.

They’ll remember the hugs, the laughter, and the moments you showed up for them.

At the end of the day, being a mom is about love.

It’s not about always making the right choice. It’s about trying, learning, and growing.

So, the next time you make a “bad” choice, remind yourself: you’re not a bad mom.

You’re just a human mom doing her best. And that’s more than enough.

With love and solidarity,

Are you a good mom who has made some bad choices? Let’s connect!

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Good Moms, Bad Choices: Embracing Imperfection