Mother needs to ask for help postpartum.

Welcoming a new baby is one of the most exciting times in a mom’s life, but it can also feel overwhelming.

No one really talks about how tough it is to ask for help during those early days, weeks, and months postpartum.

If you’re like me, a mom of four, you know that each postpartum experience is different, but one thing stays the same: we all need help sometimes.

But asking for help? That’s another story.

It can feel awkward, uncomfortable, or even like you’re admitting defeat.

Spoiler alert: you’re not. You’re being strong by recognizing that support is necessary.

Here’s how you can ask for help postpartum in a way that feels natural and empowering.

1. Embrace the Idea That It’s Okay to Need Help

First things first, let’s talk about the guilt.

Many moms feel like they should be able to do everything on their own.

The reality is, postpartum recovery and adjusting to life with a newborn is no small feat.

Whether it’s your first child or your fourth, you’re not supposed to be a superhero.

There’s no shame in needing help—whether it’s with feeding, diaper changes, or just someone to hold the baby while you shower (trust me, that shower is gold!).

Understand that asking for help doesn’t make you weak, it makes you smart.

It’s a sign of self-awareness, and that’s something to be proud of.

2. Identify Your Support System

Think about the people in your life who have offered help before or who you feel comfortable leaning on.

This could be your partner, family members, friends, or even neighbors.

Sometimes, we don’t think to ask those outside of our immediate circle, but you’d be surprised how willing people are to step in when they know what you need.

Make a mental list (or even a real one!) of those people. Keep it handy for those moments when you’re feeling especially drained and don’t know where to turn.

It can also help to think about the specific ways each person could help.

Maybe your sister is great with meal prep, while your friend is a pro at calming fussy babies. Play to their strengths!

3. Be Specific About What You Need

Here’s a little secret: people want to help, but they often don’t know how.

When someone asks, "Is there anything I can do?" don’t feel like you have to come up with a grand gesture.

Be honest and specific about what you need.

For example, instead of saying, “I’m fine, just tired,” try, “Could you drop off some groceries this week?” Or, “Would you mind watching the baby for an hour so I can nap?”

This makes it easier for others to step in and support you in a meaningful way.

Plus, it takes the guesswork out of it for them - especially your spouse!

4. Use Technology to Your Advantage

We live in a time where help is just a few taps away.

Whether you need groceries, meals, or even just a supportive ear, technology can be your best friend postpartum.

Consider apps that allow you to set up meal trains, schedule visits, or even request help with house chores.

There are also online support groups for new moms where you can vent, share tips, and feel understood by others who are going through the same thing.

Virtual help is still help, and sometimes, it's the easiest kind to ask for!

5. Delegate Household Tasks

One thing that often gets overlooked in the postpartum period is how overwhelming household responsibilities can become.

The laundry piles up, dishes stack higher, and the floors could probably use a sweep.

But guess what? You don’t have to do it all.

If you have a partner, now’s the time to have an open conversation about sharing the load.

Be upfront about what you need help with around the house.

Create a list of daily and weekly tasks that need to get done, then divide them up.

If you’re feeling up for it, you can even assign them to other family members or friends who offer help.

6. Consider Hiring Help

Sometimes, your support system may not be enough. That’s okay!

Hiring help can be a great option if it’s within your means.

Consider looking into postpartum doulas, night nurses, or even a cleaning service to take some of the pressure off.

A postpartum doula, for example, is there to support you with everything from breastfeeding to emotional well-being, while a night nurse can help you get some much-needed sleep by taking care of your baby during the night.

If you don’t have family nearby or need more specialized help, these professionals can be a lifesaver.

7. Communicate Openly With Your Partner

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, the first person you should turn to is your partner.

It’s easy to assume they know how you’re feeling, but unless you’ve communicated openly, they may not realize the full extent of what you’re going through.

Sit down and have a heart-to-heart. Share how you’ve been feeling, what you’re struggling with, and how they can support you.

Whether it’s helping out with the baby at night or just giving you a few hours of "me-time," clear communication can make a world of difference.

8. Let Go of Perfection

One of the biggest barriers to asking for help is the fear of things not being done “your way.”

Whether it’s how the laundry is folded or how someone holds the baby, it’s easy to want to control every detail.

But here’s the thing: people do things differently, and that’s okay.

If someone is willing to help, let them do it in their way. It might not be perfect by your standards, but it’ll still get done.

Plus, allowing others to step in can take a huge weight off your shoulders, even if things aren’t exactly how you’d do them.

9. Be Kind to Yourself

Finally, and most importantly, give yourself grace. This season of life is challenging, and it’s okay if you don’t have it all together.

You just brought a new life into the world, and that’s huge! Take time to rest, recover, and soak in these precious moments with your baby.

Asking for help isn’t just about getting things done; it’s about allowing yourself the space to heal and thrive postpartum.

By reaching out, you’re taking care of yourself—and that’s the best gift you can give your baby.

Takeaways: You Deserve the Help

Asking for help postpartum is not just a nice-to-have—it’s essential.

No one expects you to do it all alone, and by asking for help, you’re ensuring that you can show up as the best version of yourself for your little one.

So, mama, don’t hesitate to lean on your village even if it’s small or limited.

You’ve got this, and your support system is ready and waiting to back you up!

Remember, there’s strength in community. You’re not alone in this journey.

Asking for help postpartum is one of the kindest things you can do for yourself—and for your baby.

With love and solidarity,

9 Easy Ways to Ask for Help Postpartum