Woman experiencing postpartum resentment

Being a mom is a beautiful, life-changing experience.

But let’s be real—it's also incredibly hard. After having a baby, many moms feel resentment bubbling up.

It might be directed at a partner, family members, or even at yourself.

You're not alone. Postpartum resentment is more common than people like to admit.

Let’s unpack what’s going on and find ways to move forward.

What Is Postpartum Resentment?

Postpartum resentment is that nagging feeling of anger or frustration that creeps in after having a baby.

You might resent how much your life has changed.

Maybe you feel unsupported or misunderstood by those around you.

It can show up in small ways, like snapping at your partner, or in bigger ways, like feeling completely disconnected.

It doesn’t make you a bad mom.

It makes you human.

Why Does Postpartum Resentment Happen?

So, what’s behind these feelings? There are a few culprits.

1. Unequal Responsibilities

Caring for a baby is a lot. If it feels like you’re doing everything while your partner, family, or others aren’t pitching in, resentment can build fast.

2. Exhaustion and Burnout

Sleepless nights and endless diaper changes can wear anyone down.

When you’re tired, everything feels bigger than it really is.

3. Hormonal Changes

Your body is doing a lot of work after childbirth, and those hormonal shifts can intensify emotions.

4. Unmet Expectations

Maybe you thought your partner would step up more or that friends would check in regularly.

When reality doesn’t match your hopes, it’s easy to feel let down.

5. Loss of Identity

Motherhood is a full-time job. It can feel like there’s no space left for the “old you,” and that can be really tough to process.

How Postpartum Resentment Shows Up

It doesn’t look the same for everyone, but here are some signs it might be affecting you:

Feeling irritated or snapping at your partner.
Feeling unappreciated or taken for granted.
Avoiding certain people because they don’t “get it.”
Guilt over feeling angry when you’re “supposed to be happy.”

Sound familiar? You’re not alone.

How to Cope with Postpartum Resentment

Here’s the good news: You can work through it.

It won’t last forever, but it does take some intentional effort.

1. Talk About It

Don’t bottle it up. Share how you’re feeling with someone you trust, whether it’s your partner, a friend, or a therapist.

Be honest but kind in your delivery.

For example, instead of saying, “You never help!” try, “I’m feeling really overwhelmed and could use more help with XYZ.”

2. Ask for Help

It’s okay to ask for what you need.

Whether it’s your partner taking on more night feedings or someone watching the baby so you can nap, speak up.

3. Create a Routine

When everything feels chaotic, having a predictable schedule can be grounding.

Even small routines, like a morning coffee ritual or a nightly wind-down, can make a difference.

4. Focus on Small Wins

You don’t have to fix everything overnight.

Celebrate little victories, like taking a shower or having a peaceful moment with your baby.

5. Let Go of Perfection

No one is a perfect parent, no matter how Instagram makes it look.

Give yourself grace and let some things slide.

6. Take Time for Yourself

You are more than just a mom. Even 15 minutes to read a book, journal, or take a power nap can recharge you.

7. Seek Professional Help if Needed

Sometimes resentment stems from deeper issues, like postpartum depression or anxiety.

A therapist can help you work through those feelings in a safe space.

Couple arguing while woman holds their baby

Encouragement for Moms

You’re not failing. You’re adjusting.

Postpartum resentment doesn’t mean you love your baby any less.

It’s just your body and mind reacting to the massive changes in your life.

Over time, you’ll find a rhythm that works for you.

If you’re feeling stuck, reach out.

Whether it’s to a friend, partner, or professional, there’s no shame in getting support.

Too often, moms feel like they can’t talk about these feelings.

Society expects us to glow with joy after having a baby, but the truth is, it’s messy.

Postpartum resentment doesn’t define you. What matters is how you move through it.

Take it one step at a time. You’ve got this.

With love and solidarity,

Are you struggling with postpartum resentment? Let’s connect!

I will help you find solutions for immediate relief!

Reach out for a free consultation today!

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What Is Postpartum Resentment?