Tantrums at Bedtime: Advice for New Moms
Battling bedtime tantrums is almost a rite of passage for new moms.
After a long day, the last thing you need is a bedtime tantrum.
Here's a practical guide on handling bedtime tantrums, featuring tips that have worked for me as a mom of four and as a perinatal mental health therapist.
10 Tips to Manage Tantrums at Bedtime
1) Keep a Consistent Routine
Kids love predictability. Setting a consistent bedtime routine can work wonders.
Bath, book, bed—whatever fits your family style, stick to it.
When children know what to expect, they're less likely to put up a fight. Consistency is your new best friend here!
2) Set the Environment
Create a calming bedroom environment that invites relaxation.
Dim lights, soft music, or white noise can help signal that it's time to wind down. Make the bedroom a cozy sanctuary, not a battleground.
3) Address Their Needs
Sometimes, tantrums are a child's way of telling you they need something.
Maybe they're hungry or need one last hug. A quick check-in can save you both from a drawn-out tantrum.
It's all about hitting pause and seeing what’s up.
4) Use Simple Choices
Empower your little one by letting them make simple choices: "Do you want the blue pajamas or the red tonight?"
This gives them a sense of control and can prevent a power struggle.
5) Stay Calm and Collected
Easier said than done, right? But your calm is contagious.
Even if you’re on your last nerve, a calm demeanor can de-escalate a tantrum quickly.
Take a deep breath and put on noise-canceling headphones —you've got this!
6) Positive Reinforcement
Catch them being good! Praise your child when they go through their bedtime routine without a fuss.
A little "Great job tonight!" can motivate them to repeat the good behavior.
7) Teach Self-Soothing Techniques
This is a big one.
Teach your child simple self-soothing techniques like deep breathing or thinking of a happy place.
These tools can help them manage their emotions and make bedtime a lot smoother.
8) Be Patient
It’s tough but try to keep your expectations realistic.
Learning to go to bed peacefully is a process. Celebrate the small victories along the way.
9) Involve All Caregivers
Make sure everyone who puts your child to bed is on the same page.
Consistency across caregivers can reinforce the routine and the rules.
10) Know When to Seek Help
If bedtime tantrums seem excessive or don’t improve with strategies, it might be helpful to talk to a professional.
Sometimes, underlying issues need addressing, and that’s perfectly okay.
Takeaways:
Remember, you're not alone in this bedtime battle.
Every mom has been there. Be patient with yourself and your little one. You're both learning and growing together.
With a bit of strategy and a lot of love, bedtime can become a peaceful, bonding time rather than a nightly hassle.
With love and solidarity,
Are you a mom struggling with tantrums at bedtime? Let’s connect!
Reach out for a free consultation today!
Related Articles:
Reframing the "Terrible Twos": Celebrating Toddler Development
Gentle Parenting Tantrums: 8 Expert Tips
Unlock the Secret to Happy Families: Conscious Parenting
Sources:
Van den akker, A., Hoffenaar, P., Overbeek, G. Temper Tantrums in Toddlers and Preschoolers: Longitudinal Associations with Adjustment Problems. J Dev Behav Pediatr. 2022 Sep; 43(7): 409–417.
